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Comment by georgefrick | Hacker News Reader

So when did you meet your wife? During a dinner break? When do you handle maintenance items? (cleaning, washing, lawn care, taxes). Should I assume this is all done by someone else? It's not realistic to bring a founder argument into the realm of a normal worker; who may or may not have a family yet, and isn't paid in the realm of affording to retain services. Maybe I'm missing something; the hours just don't add up. Do you fit all family activity into that 5:00 - 8:30 block? Son's baseball means no dinner that night? I realize I sound like a smart ass; but it's more of an accounting/detail oriented twitch. The math isn't working in my head and I'd like to understand.

Edit: I do respect your work ethic, again I know I sound like a smart ass; but I'm just trying to understand. I couldn't physically work those hours and handle all of my responsibilities.

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My schedule is variable - so I do what I need to do at any point in the day. For example I'm choosing to write this instead of responding to my email :).

I met my wife in college and we had our three kids before I became a founder. We outsource a lot of the "maintenance" (lawn care, home repair, taxes) but I usually spend an hour of my day cleaning the kitchen.

Son's baseball means no dinner that night?

Yea, actually. We have to be really flexible with our family activities.

At any point in the day we are overloaded, which is fine with us but we have found ways to prioritize what we need to make it work. For example my wife goes rowing right after our kids go to sleep while I work and I respond to any kids if they wake up for a few hours.

It's just a super complicated juggling act.

what you describe is nice, but it lacks one thing I value a lot - freedom. of choice, of doing things just randomly and not planning every single thing and if something goes wrong, house of cards scenario might happen. freedom to meet a friend randomly not because now I have 1 hour I can afford to spend, but just because I have that hour any evening, any day, any year. not even going into things like longer travelling (ie min. 2 weeks), probably the most enlightening activity one can do to his mind.

good for you (but only if rest of your family truly agrees), but to me, you describe pretty much a nightmare. the few guys (in non-founder area) that were so super-performant, and were godsend for their employers, were actually shitty partners, friends and fathers. Your health is a good indicator if your mind is not stretching things too far. And last thing - for most women, it doesn't count how much time you spend with them, it's the time without, lack of intimacy that moves them into distance in relationships.

You're not being a smart ass. Either he is a robot or his numbers simply don't add up.

My wife does say that I'm basically a robot.

Do you have Hyperthymic Temperament[0], by any chance? It's rare. I know one guy who has it and is basically like what you describe: always on. He's the only person I've ever met who can happily work 16 hour days for years on end without it eventually catching up to him.

[0]: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperthymic_temperament

Interesting. I had never heard of that, but the characteristics are pretty spot on for me.

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