One of the things I enjoy about Aikido is that many of the techniques have "nice" and "not so nice" variations. The ikkyo technique can put an opponent on the ground with a minimal amount of pain. The nikyo technique is similar in some ways but can hurt a heck of a lot more because of the way the wrist is manipulated. I am guessing your friend(s) was illustrating that aikido has some nice ways of inducing compliance and some "not so nice" wrist breaking ways of inducing compliance.