I've no idea why she's put up with FB for long. I've none of the issues she has with Facebook, I just hate it on privacy reasons. So... I don't use it.

But if she's gotta use it just submit fake ID. Scan your license or passport, and edit information. This works fine and there is nothing wrong with it.

Complaining about their security policies... Eh I'm gonna guess that FB engineers probably want to protect user accounts as that's in their interest. It doesn't help them to lock users out for no reason. FB is a private company, and, as much as I dislike them, they can do whatever they want, including requiring ID to login.

Though, I'd imagine you could file a lawsuit to force them to delete your info, if they refuse to do so without ID. But that'd probably leak your ID in the process.