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Some might advise you to keep pushing her and pushing her because "we need more women in STEM" and all that. I would advise you to just let her be. We like to teach our children that they can be anything they want to be when they grow up. So... maybe she doesn't want to be a software developer.

"We need more women in STEM... even if we have to drag them kicking and screaming", said no one ever.

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What is needed is to stop pushing women out of STEM (believe it or not, many girls are attracted to it) and encourage them to get into it to the same degree we do for boys. You're absolutely right that force is not the way to go.

I used to ridicule my sister for liking Barbie dolls and books about ponies. She grew up to become a physician despite playing with dolls in her youth, so I think all is well.

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