Tell HN: Deeply creepy people you may know, suggested by Facebook.

Have you not heard of the Facebook ad network? Are you under the impression your dating site doesn't advertise?

"how is this possible?"? That's been obvious for a while now. They track you. Everywhere. Same with google.

Doesn't "everyone in IT/CS" use tools like Request Policy, uBlock Origin, Privacy Badger, etc. or a good old-fashioned hosts file to prevent said tracking? Not to mention VPN+Privoxy on a VPS?

Well, considering I'm in the IT/CS group and I don't use those tools, the idea that "everyone" uses them is demonstrably false.

Secondly, the fact that it's the most probable explanation of the link between facebook/dating sites, and it hasn't been mentioned yet....clearly they're not that popular.

Finally, can people stop thinking that the way they use the internet is the same way everyone does? That's so far from reality it's not funny.

I do not believe everyone uses the internet like I do, but I have assumed many people on HN do something similar. Considering the number of threads I've read about such tools on HN over the years, I don't think it is far fetched to believe that many people on HN use these tools.

Maybe this won't be a popular response, but what we do know is that Facebook couldn't give a single fuck about your privacy or protecting your private information. (Insofar as they "care" it is to protect their own interests.) It is prudent to assume and expect that they will exploit you in any way possible. So if you are so concerned, why are you even on Facebook?

I would guess she searched for you.

But HOW? All she knows is my first name and suburb, and I have a very common first name.

With a more complex search perhaps?

Facebook parses and actually works with queries such as "single [gender] friends of friends of friends who live in [X] and like [Y]".

If images used on the dating site also appear on Facebook then Google Images can do the rest...

Doubtful. Email and social graph correlation is usually how sites monetize to keep it "free" and survive.

The person could have internet stalked you and viewed your FB profile. You could have exchanged phone numbers and one of you is using the FB app which uploads your contacts in the background.

IF this is the standard FB friend suggest then I don't believe its via their ad network. So the above suggestions are more likely.

I had the same experience with facebook but in a different way, facebook suggested my father and my uncle though I have completely different nick name. No mutual friend what so ever. I still can not figure out how facebook recommendation system found my dad and uncle!

Did you sign to this site using Facebook?

To the dating site? No. My user account is created via email.

You didn't link your account on the dating site to your facebook account, but maybe the girl did, so facebook knew that the girl was in touch with your dating account, and somehow they had access to your dating profile which includes your email, which they matched in their email database to get your facebook account.

FB likely buys, sells and aggregates graph data from numerous other social sites and applies deep learning in order to pre-stalk possible connections and make other suggestions for users' "convenience."

If you did use Facebook Connect or authorize an FB app in anyway, that would probably be enough to generate a link somewhere.

In any event, men tend to be the pursuers on dating websites. It sounds a lot like bragplaining. Except normally females do it, and they're a lot likely to see you as creepy because numbers are lopsided in their favor.

Not saying you're creepy - but the reason dating websites are a time sink is everyone's ecstatic about telling their story - no one's interested in yours. Even if they were very humble, you'd be competing against 10's to 100's of pastes.

You don't even have to, all you have to do is visit both sites from the same browser, and they can use the ad-network cookies to track you.

Wait, wait... You signed up for Facebook, used it, continue to use it, and then got upset when they violated your privacy?

So What The Fuck? I mean really, WHAT. THE. FUCK? Can I say WTF any louder?

How is this possible?

It's happened to me as well. Facebook has unmasked the full identity of many girls I've simply messaged through apps like Tinder or Happn. It's so predictable I often check the suggested friends expecting to see people I've been chatting with on other services.

How much do you value your privacy? Do you allow requests from Dating Site to Facebook? Unless you explicitly value your privacy and take steps to ensure it assume all webpages report back to Facebook, Google, Twitter.