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Before you become honest, make sure you understand the politics of your team. I worked with a 40 something obese, single, just plain miserable neckbeard who got off on hazing new employees. I mentioned this in the one on one to our manager and the day after, both manager and neckbeard conspired to make my life hell. And they won, I resigned.

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And when hiring, it's important to avoid hiring folks who think it's appropriate to recount a problem by saying the other person was old, fat, single, and a "miserable neckbeard" before they mention a single word about the problem.

That's poisonous behavior, and if you let that sort of cancer into your company, you won't get it out. Attacking behaviors is great, attacking people is garbage.

Yup, there's an art to it. You have to make sure your manager is actually on your side first. Good managers are, bad managers pay lip service to the idea. In between there are many well intentioned managers who haven't figured out the skill of encouraging openness.

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