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How is anything remotely related to AI a "glorified calculator"?

Pedantically yes, you are taking inputs into a black box and recieving output.

This level of reductionist thinking actually hampers progress in AI, because you're stuck on Chinese room. I mean seriously, they already had this discussion like 20 years ago "fam".

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The progress we've made in AI can be summed up by a very nice analogy I recently about Deep Mind beating the Go world champion: "We need to make transistors* and we just discovered fire."

Yeah, you are right. It's some progress.

* For the record, we don't even know if it even possible to make transistors in this hypothetical universe of AI.

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