I'm sorry to hear this, Pieter. I don't have a question, but would just like to wish you well - as much as possible under the circumstances.
Well, it all started when I was about three, and I discovered ants. Fire ants, to be specific. Biting me all over cause I'd chosen to hide right on top of their nest. There's a lesson there.
All the best.
Other than that, and about a thousand fuck ups that seem inevitable on the road of life, I regret nothing, and admit nothing.