Why did you assume an expert Erlang programmer to be a female?
Edit: I always use "he/she" or "her/him"
Edit: I always use "he/she" or "her/him"
I do think using "she" as the hypothetical example for roles people think of as male is still useful; it hopefully makes people question their knee-jerk response a bit.
Using the names and pronouns with someone that they prefer is the polite thing to do, even if you don't "get" it. :)