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"the plethora of stagnant apps you force onto my device"

While I agree, any stock Android phone from a carrier has quite a few itself.

Didn't Apple just announce that they'll be allowing users to delete pre-installed apps come iOS 10?

They did. I'm running the iOS 10 beta and while there are still a few core apps you can't delete I was able to remove everything I don't use (tips, stocks etc.).

I suppose deleting the phone app, App Store and settings doesn't make much sense.

Oh that's hilarious. Not only is Android many times worse than iOS in this respect already, now iOS has got rid of the problem completely, but still ragequit.

Does the Macalope still do those pundit takedowns? This week's should be a hoot.

That may be true but it is a smaller problem for Android.

You don't need a folder called "Junk" because they are not cluttering the home screen, they are buried in the app drawer.

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