What I'm trying to say is that while your quip is entertaining:
a) it's impractical to scan/compromise IoT devices remotely without a stupid design (by IoT standards stupid, btw- not regular internet design- we're talking REALLY REALLY STUPID).
b) I would bet my mortgage that the logic you are presenting was never considered by the relevant carriers. They're not that smart.
[1] https://www.wirelessweek.com/news/2016/07/verizon-targeting-...
I don't think this is that insane. I doubt there are many devices that only support UMTS, but there are tons that only support GSM, including many in embedded systems that can't easily be upgraded. So by using most of your spectrum for LTE, you get spectrum efficiency, and supporting GSM you can support everything that doesn't do LTE (just not at high speeds).