> they should be terrified of driving, but they aren't

Driving you can control for everything pretty much but the 'other guy'.

When flying you are depending on multiple 'other guys or gals' all doing their job correctly, not making mistakes in multiple areas where there is no way for you to verify. So the unknown factor is considerably higher, regardless of statistics.

With driving if the weather is bad you can typically drive later/earlier a different day. With flying that is not the case. You are locked in financially to perhaps taking a bigger chance than you might if you could just work around the weather (in two cities).