You're basically asking: how do I do successful marketing, right? I don't have the answer to that, but I'd presume that despite many flashy resources out there claiming otherwise, there is no secret sauce, you have to put in the work of advertising (and finding out which channels work best for you), and of course the very important SEO.

By the way, I used your site and had a decent experience. I'm not a typical user of these, but it was interesting. You mentioned that other sites allow trolls to flood in - how do you prevent that?