Hacker News Reader

Comment by ktRolster | Hacker News Reader

Sorry Travis; once an asshole, always an asshole;

No, people actually do change, you know.

People do; grandparent's idiom isn't accurate.

But I've found that I don't have the mental fortitude to wait for them and see abuse meted out in the meantime. Deliberate assholery once, I'm going to be suspicious for a long, long time. Asshole twice, we're done.

Even so, what do we get for waiting anyway? Uber is easily supplanted, they're not special as a competitive force.

I was being general. Uber has been a deliberate asshole more than once.

Name some.

You. 10 years from now. Mark my words, remember this comment, come back here and tell me if you've changed.

Poster probably won't change even in ten years, see research by Dweck. Fixed mindsets are a powerful negative thing. I salute you for believing in the right thing, a growth, malleable mindset supported by modern neuroscience and neuroplasticity!

I don't doubt I will change, but his or her comment was implying people can radically change and do a complete 180. In my experience in life so far, that almost never happens and I was asking for famous examples.

How about Bill Gates? Nobody could have seen him being the most prolific philanthropist of all time back when he was leading Microsoft in the 90's.

I don't know if those are orthogonal though (ruthless business leader and philanthropist). Andrew Carnegie is another great example.

Those qualities aren't necessarily orthogonal, but think about what it implies about how you should treat that ruthless capitalist.

Every dollar you gave to Bill Gates ended up being rather effectively used for good.

I'm guessing (matter-of-factly) that you don't have a degree in psychology.

I'm a different person than I was ten years ago. Some things remained the same, a few things changed.

It's hard to quantify how "different of a person" you are. But if there's one thing reading psych literature taught me it's that traits like aggression and compassion (or lack thereof) are measurable and shockingly persistent in people over decades.

Circumstances, triggers, and incentives change wildly. The world is in flux. But people's attitudes generally are not.

There's a huge difference between "can't" and "don't." People can change.

I have a degree in psychology and I would love to know which studies you are referring to there because I am not aware of such well established facts.

IIRC, there were two traits that don't seem to change over the course of one's life: gregariousness, and level of anxiety.

Traits other than those two can change. Classic example: an alcoholic who becomes sober.

An alcoholic that becomes sober is still an alcoholic, they are just in control over their alcoholism.

A rude person that becomes conscious of the way it comes across to act disrespectfully may still be an rude inside, but if he/she is in control of the disrespectful behavior then I count that as real change.

Reply on news.ycombinator.com