I supposed I very slightly lean towards an edit for increased clarity on Taplin's part, but it I don't think the current phrasing is meaningfully wrong, in the way that you do. Damore left the door wide open to that interpretation, and I'm not at all sure it isn't what he thinks.
> He didn't get a world class editor (present performance notwithstanding) or the opportunity to print retractions
I'm sure he is surprised at his memo's international newsmaking, but he is not modifying his stance based on the feedback he has received. In his recent WSJ article [0], Damore wrote "I committed heresy against the Google creed by stating that not all disparities between men and women that we see in the world are the result of discriminatory treatment" ... which indicates he still thinks the memo was basically fine and that that's all he was doing. He's focusing on the echo chamber and the most gentle and obvious idea in his memo (that not 100% of gender variance is socially constructed). He assumes the only people who were not in agreement with him and complained were those who believe "that all differences in outcome are due to differential treatment and all people are inherently the same."
He takes no responsibility for not ever quantifying the biological effect, yet still recommending changes to the processes based only on that the biological component exists at all. This makes no sense to me. Unless maybe he cannot even see the logical gap there because it is filled with his own beliefs and stereotypes about gender.
I assume that article gave him the opportunity to consult a world class editor, and he may print retractions if he chooses.
[0] https://www.wsj.com/articles/why-i-was-fired-by-google-15024...