Like you said, typical users such as your parents have no idea what software their phone is running; they just want it to work. Android 2.1 works perfectly well, and the fact that 2.2 has been announced but is not yet commercially available is no hindrance to people who don't care for such matters.
The only people who really seem to be getting up in arms about Android 2.2 not being available right now are the Apple fanatics.
Some phones will be updated, and some will not. Some won't get the update because:
1. The hardware is too old/slow/underpowered/too little RAM for the new OS
2. The manufacturer/carrier doesn't give a damn and doesn't feel like pouring money into an old phone when doing so doesn't give them any new revenue.
Either way, your complaint isn't with Android or Google.
So your comparison is not adequate.
The fact that unlocked multi-carrier phones aren't readily available is a problem with how the carriers and wireless service works, and has nothing to do with Android, or iOS, for that matter.
That is a problem with the structure of the Android ecosystem, which by extension is a complaint with Android itself.
Apple has, what... 8 devices (4 generations of iPhone, 3 of iPod Touch, and the iPad) out? Hell, at least that many new Android phones have or will come out this year alone!
And even Apple can't keep all their devices up-to-date: people with the iPhone 3G are reporting slowness and instability with iOS 4. I imagine the 1st-gen iPod Touch (and maybe even 2nd-gen) would have trouble as well. And last I read, iOS 4 isn't available yet for the iPad. So Apple's track record is (on the generous side) that 50% of their potentially-capable devices work with iOS 4.
There's an easy way to solve the "what version of Android does this phone I'm considering buying have on it?" problem -- ask a salesperson. If they don't know, ask the manufacturer. Or just google for it. I'm sure someone else has the phone and has noted it somewhere, or some reviewer has gotten a review unit and has noted the version.
And how do you know if it's going to get upgrades? You go by the manufacturer's past record with such things. The interwebs can tell you all this, and more.
This is the same problem we had in the past, but it is more of an issue now. This is what Apple freed us from, no matter what carrier it is on in the world, I can upgrade my phone.
Android do a lot of things right, this is not one of them.
Huh? We're not talking about the laptop (phone) you bought today. We're talking about the one you bought a year (or more) ago.
And the laptop comparison is limited: new laptops generally have more than enough power to run the current OS and apps. Embedded devices usually have just enough and not much more. People don't like to buy $1000 phones, so we get a single-core 1GHz Snapdragon with 512MB of RAM instead of a dual-core 1GHz Tegra2 with 1GB of RAM.
> This is the same problem we had in the past, but it is more of an issue now. This is what Apple freed us from, no matter what carrier it is on in the world, I can upgrade my phone.
Well, unless you have an iPhone 3G -- reports are that iOS4 is unstable and slow as hell.
And I have a Nexus One, and I can use it on whatever carrier I like, and upgrade it to whatever software I like. Granted, custom Android mods aren't for your average consumer, but I expect (ok, wishfully hope) that to change in the next few years.
Some support cutoff point for old models makes sense.
It's not a problem, it's a trade-off. Given the rapid advancement of Android lately, it can be argued that it's an appropriate one. Pick your poison, eh?