I guess the most valuable while still feasible thing would be a distributed eventually consistent key-value store (ideally with no-nonsense pricing: just per pay read/write/delete, with a single unit cost regardless how small or big you are - but please do provide an efficient way to delete the entire db, unlike GC Datastore).

Maybe different tariffs based on the percentage of reads that you can serve locally, the average latency or something similar, in order to avoid having to replicate every piece of data to every edge?

It sounds like you're slowly working towards becoming some sort of insane hosting company