There is a solution for this and it's Early Retirement Extreme. But it's not what you think. Ignore the "Retirement" word and think "Financial Independence" and ERE is a way to get there. The whole idea is you live well below your means and save like crazy. As much as you can percentage-wise. Eventually, you will have saved enough to be able to live off of your savings by at the safe withdrawal rate of 2.5-4% (depending on your conservative/optimistic bent).
The funny thing is the more you save, the better you become at living on less and therefore the less you need to be financially independent. There are all kinds of facets to it so go google.
It does require effort but in our industry, you can do it. Also there are loads of software dev jobs for older people in the midwest.
I'm doing ERE though so I can be financially independent enough to work on my own businesses (I'm bootstrapping one as a side project, already profitable but only 1/40 of way to replacing full time income). Partly due to fear of agism but also due to being sick of the VC startup world and working for big companies. A life of fear gets old. Why not take it by the reigns and exert some control?