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>before any other consideration, make the other person feel at ease

What excellent advice! My go-to line has been "what's been keeping you busy lately" which is a polite form of asking what someone "does" without making them them I only care what job they have.

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That is how you should always interpret the "how are you?" question. Don't just say "I'm fine" - talk about what you did today, what you're going to do tonight, or tomorrow, or in the weekend. That's usually a good jumping off point to talk about some other topics.

Also: https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/03/18/88-dinner-partie...

Except when "how are you?" just means "hi".

I really like this twist, I'm going to start using it myself. Thanks!

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