When I started teaching myself I never thought it would take me so long. I made two mistakes: I didn't have direction (which you solved by asking a question) and I didn't build stuff.

From this point forward you ought to pick one thing and build stuff. When I say pick one thing, I mean one learning resource at a time. Whether it is "automate the boring stuff" (which is a great resource I haven't read) or one of the resources that I'm linking to (they are different resources that have been suggested on HN in the past), or a suggestion from another comment. Pick one and work on it. It's all about making a decision and sticking to it until you have enough information to make a better decision.

Find someone you can talk with about this stuff. It can get lonely if you don't know anyone who knows about this stuff. I'm available and would even work on some of the material or courses with you, especially the last two links.

As another user mentioned somewhere below, you will feel like bashing your head against the wall. He/she wasn't kidding. Once you get past that feeling, which will take a very, very long time, you will have overcome the hardest hurdle.

https://github.com/MichielDerhaeg/build-linux/blob/master/RE...

http://exercism.io/

https://mitpress.mit.edu/sicp/full-text/book/book.html

https://github.com/ossu/computer-science/blob/master/README....

Edit: for anyone else in OP's shoes, feel free to contact me as well.