The best urban environments I've lived in so far are the ones in the ex-USSR. They had moderate amount of street retail, not too much, but were very walkable. Today, in the area around me they began retrofitting the lowest levels of the condo buildings with cafeterias and such and it is becoming too busy, too messy and uncomfortable the people who lives in these buildings. Generally, what you need is not a retail in every building, but smaller size stand-alone stores and strip malls, in bigger numbers. Also, American condo buildings rarely have separation lawns between the street and buildings themselves, sidewalks are extremely narrow and not asphalted (asphalt is much nicer to walk on and prevents the grass shoots from poking through the pavement), the whole city blocks layouts are bad (no courtyards, playgrounds inside, all have traffic going through them - unsafe for children).

TL,DR: If you want to get a nice, family friendly, comfortable urban environments -check the former USSR and the other Eastern Block countries.