When you have a divorce, separation, etc - the person is still there, still alive, around, may or may not communicate with you, etc. You can know that they're OK, even if they had to find happiness with someone else or whatever happened.

I was working late to make up some time and had headphones on. Wife told me "I'm gonna go soak in the tub and go to bed, see you in a bit." A couple hours later I finished what I was doing and headed towards the bedroom. I noticed the bathroom light was still on, and found her. Apparent heart attack and she drowned in the bathtub, and she'd been gone a while by the time I found her. Sudden wrenching loss. No opportunity to make up for fights. No goodbye. Just.. gone.

Anyway. This isn't about me. This is about the community helping Matt, in whatever way we can.

No need for a hypothetical scenario in my case. It sucks, greatly, but I imagine pales in comparison to having a loving wife suddenly die.

Dude.