So let's say there are two people with red dots, let's name them Ruth and Rudy. Ruth now knows that "not all dots are blue" (which is equivalent to "there is at least one red dot"). She sees Rudy with the red dot: Fine, here's the person with the red dot.
But wait a minute, why is Rudy not killing himself? If Rudy is the only person with a red dot, he should have seen only blue dots... however he knows there has to be at least one red dot, so if he only saw blue dots, the red dot must have been him, so he would have killed himself.
But he didn't, so that means he has seen at least one red dot, which isn't him, and isn't anybody else Ruth has seen because she only saw blue dots otherwise.
Oh no, it must be Ruth with the second red dot!