I keep wondering lately if anyone is actually an "adult", or if everyone is just faking it because that's what society expects... this leading to a vicious circle.
I’m not 100% sure what he meant by that, but I find that every few months the way I see the world almost completely changes. I’m more accepting, calmer, less inclined to get into heated debates over opinions, when people exhibit “crazy” behavior I actually kind of understand where they’re coming from. I hope that’s growth, and I hope that never stops.
But yeah, I’m 32 now, and I’m like damn some people are raising children at this age now. My uncle was in his early 30s when he adopted me and we fought a lot. Now I get it, because at this point in my life I feel like I couldn’t possibly raise a child with wisdom and assertiveness and patience.
Some people at around 40 go "I was such an idiot at 20! now I know exactly what's going on"... without realising that they'll probably look back in another 20 years and think the same (I say this as a 42 year old dunce). I see the fractal parent of this in larger society - always looking back at the past and mocking how foolish people were. Every generation was more stupid than the one that came after it, their theories more ridiculous - right up until us. Finally we have it all worked out. Phew!
For any given task X that needs doing, you can either do it because it needs doing, only do it when tightly supervised, or not bother someone else will take care of it. Where X could be anything, go to the gym, raise children, a job or business, politics, all manner of things.
No amount of drive alone (which is what you're talking about) will fix it.
They are the folk who have not just survived the deep sea, but come out the other side with minimum damage. These people exist just like people who have summited mountains exist. You can't fake that shit. And you'll automatically know them when you see them.
I mean, I am not judging people for doing it. Not at all. It's a good way to get to know oneself better!
Being an adult however is a battle you have every day.
I bet you'd get a similar answer from psychologists mostly because well adjusted people tend to not visit them.
Add a smidgen of bias in remembering and setting affecting the confessions, here's your full picture.
You're also making a selection bias, assuming people that see a psychologist are not well adjusted. It's equally possible that only well adjusted people seek psychological consult, while others are sublimating their problems.
I don't necessarily agree with that conclusion either, but I think it's worth pointing out. Especially when discussing emotional maturity.
> If you give me six lines written by the hand of the most honest of men, I will find something in them which will hang him.
We're all imperfect beings.
The older I get (am 40 now) the more I tend to believe in the "faking it" part.
(Too soon?)