Mr. Rogers was my actual neighbor | Hacker News Reader

Mr. Rogers was my actual neighbor

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73 pointsbenryon19 comments

The lesson I take from such anecdotes is simply to be authentic. Most of my frustrations with people come from a lack of authenticity. In particular, in the working world, there is a tendency to let organizational roles, structures, and responsibilities turn our interactions into something less than being our authentic selves, and that is the root cause of many frustrations.

"Be authentic" is not good advice to adults.

To kids, sure. But you also have to explain to them that as an adult, nobody cares for your search for authenticity, you're expected to show up and work. There are too many people who are flaky these days who all think they're special, I think it's related to the wave of "be authentic" advice out there.

Edited to not come across as negative - people are real sensitive about that.

I don't think you and I are talking about the same kind of authenticity.

Do you mean a codified and consistent set of actions and beliefs that we recognize as ourselves and appreciate?

Like people who think "I should stand up for myself at work more" and it causes internal strife?

I tend to put on opposite ends of the spectrum being strategic and authentic. Authentic interactions with people at work generally are better for everybody if you are in an environment that is compatible with that. Many environments are not so you have to be more reserved and strategic about what you say and how you interact with people. Being authentic with people outside of work is not terrible advice. Allowing people to know you are having some emotion such as happiness or fear or sadness allows people become closer to you and you to them. Mr Rogers talked a lot about that—expressing how you feel about things. I think many people misconstrue mr Rogers to be all about the “you are special” thing. But his target demographic was kids who likely were not that well off and had not great family lives. Having somebody who tells you that you are not a piece of trash probably helped a lot of kids.

>nobody cares for your search for authenticity, you're expected to show up and work.

You are equating being authentic with being irresponsible, and those are not the same things at all.

Good point.

I've only ever heard the "be authentic" bit from irresponsible people (or adults talking to children). The adults who took it seriously are naive underachievers (obviously imo).

That's only anecdata though, I should qualify and separate that out when discussing it; thanks for helping my crystalize the thought.

There's a difference between being unique and being authentic, but you are somewhat conflating those terms. People often think they are "special" individuals who are "unique", but it's far less common for people to think of themselves as being authentic. Someone can be totally average yet be exceedingly authentic in their averageness, the opposite being someone who is very unique on the inside but behaves like an average person because of things like blending in.

> nobody cares for your search for authenticity, you're expected to show up and work

Sounds like you're saying you can't be authentic and work hard at the same time.

I got to meet him at an art opening back in the 90's. The accounts of him as a genuine nice guy, I feel, are accurate.

As far as appearance goes he was definitely more urbane than his sweater-wearing persona on the TV show would suggest. Of course he was a sophisticated creative person in an environment with adults. Meanwhile, we were all silently channeling our innermost 5-year-old selves (he probably knew that and was used to it)!

Incase anyone hasn’t seen this video of him presenting before the senate committee in 1969, in support of national public television.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fKy7ljRr0AA

tl;dr the author had a one-time encounter with Mr. Rogers when the author was soliciting donations for his little league. Mr. Rogers was as empathetic as he was portrayed on his shows. That erased any previous doubt that the author had regarding Mr. Rogers' authenticity.

Concur, until about halfway thru it’s quite a good read

Also, he lied to Mr. Rogers which seems like it deserved more introspection than evidenced in the article.

> tl;dr

No such article about Mr Rogers is TL. They're all worth reading. :-)

Was the $1 Rogers donated a generous amount back then? What real world items might it have bought?

Why the downvote? It’s a serious question. IIRC you could buy an ice cream cone for perhaps .05-.10?

I was a kid in NYC in the late 50's early 60's. My sister and I bought a soft pretzel from street vendors for a nickel or 6 for a quarter. We also got a lunch from a pizza place of a slice and a coke for a quarter.

So the $1 could have benefited the team significantly. It was hard to get from the article wether the author was thankful for the $1 or thought it was petty.

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