For what it's worth, Facebook doesn't make any money when you use PyTorch, nor does it help any of their business goals to have more people use PyTorch. If I were you I would just use the open source projects you want to and not worry about it.
I appreciate your suggestion, but that's not how I think it works. The use of open-source projects of a company directly supports the "R&D machine" of that company, by acknowledging the output of the researchers. The reason is that many researchers would not work for a company if there was no possibility of publication and acknowledgement. So by avoiding these projects, I implicitly vote for these researchers to work for companies with better ethical standards.