Comment by danso | Hacker News Reader

Comment by danso | Hacker News Reader

Besides how unusual it is for the NYT to write about the suicide of someone non-famous, this story struck me as being very much of this modern age:

- The deceased was a software developer (his last job was senior director of development at Dell) who couldn't find work in his 50s and 60s and was living on food stamps at the time of his death. [0]

- He changed his name late in life because it was forever connected via online search results to an incident of disorderly conduct that made the news. [1]

- He bought a vial of poison from the dark web.

- His body, at the driver seat of his car, was ignored for a week in Manhattan because people assumed he was just a napping Uber driver.

- Despite his car being tracked by all the city's surveillance cameras and license plate readers -- including the geo-coordinates of his last known phone call -- the NYPD were unable to locate him.

- The NYPD initially ignored the missing person report because it was faxed instead of emailed.

[0] https://www.pbs.org/newshour/show/brutal-job-search-reality-...

[1] https://www.cbsnews.com/news/geoffrey-weglarz-conn-man-threw...

Man does this motivate me to start saving more for retirement. No one and nothing will be able to care for you more than your past selves.

Having close relationships with family and/or friends also helps if you need a bit of care.

THIS!! Community is what keeps people alive. Mentally, physically, emotionally, and what-ever-else-ally. Even hanging out with a younger crowd is beneficial to you.

I think financially is prominently missing in your list, the hardest part. There are limits to how much your community can help you with that, and there are limits to how long you want to be a burden to them.

Financial means is certainly a requirement for a healthy retirement, but parent and GP are probably assuming that's handled, and so a focus on relationships and community becomes top priority (or second).

Living alone with billions in the bank is still a lonely existence when the rest of your world has forgotten about you.

This person seems to have kept in regular touch with friends and family, texting regularly, and even telling them about buying deadly poison.

It's obviously a very complex topic, and it's hard to know if this person's social needs were actually being met. I was just trying to encourage people not to forget social aspects when examining their susceptibility to depression.

> If you are having thoughts of suicide, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 (TALK) or go to SpeakingOfSuicide.com/resources for a list of additional resources.

At the end of the day, that is the best insurance, if one can do it. Even better is mind training - for the real slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.

Or you know, we as a society could decided to actually help people.

Not just save more for retirement, but also work on lowering your cost of living.

Exactly, lowering your cost of living easily makes your money outlive you*; a much more comfortable position to be in.

Good! I see so many second-hand stories of people not having enough in retirement to live comfortably. It's really rocked my world as far as retirement is concerned, living within your means, and understanding debt. Sure, SS is nice, but depending on it is a recipe for disaster.

For anybody who hasn't yet, pick a target percentage of your income that you want to save for retirement. If you're late getting started, this could be pretty high (20-30% in some cases).

Set up automatic withdrawal to a 401(k)/IRA for whatever percentage you can afford next month (say 3%), then just increase it by 0.5% per month until you get to your goal. The slow progression will give you time to adjust your hedonic treadmill down in line with your increased savings.

> how unusual it is for the NYT to write about the suicide of someone non-famous

I'd say this article is less about a suicide than about NYC... In that case there are many NYT articles I've read over the years that fit this genre: the anonymity of being in a big city.

Two articles that come to mind (sorry no links) that I've read in the past year or two: one article about how New Yorkers who die and family cannot be reached end up in the city cemetery. Another interesting article about an 80s murder cold case and retracing the victims life 3 decades later. Both really good journalism.

It's interesting. A place where people live on top of each other and in such density and yet everyone can feel so alone.

On that theme, this piece from three years ago devastated me: "The Lonely Death of George Bell", https://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/18/nyregion/dying-alone-in-n...

Thank you. I just read it in one sitting. Amazing story.

I think Sales, not coding. But the rest of your post highlights the dystopian nature of the situation.

> the geo-coordinates of his last known phone call

Or deceptively the address closest to those co-ordinates https://splinternews.com/why-do-people-keep-coming-to-this-c...

This list is totally over the top and a sign of a writer trying satire for the first time. Except it's true.

>>He left and went to Dell as a senior director of development.

He was not a software developer. I also I have long believed skills > management on the longer run.

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