A really good reply to the first would be "If I wait until it it is a little bigger I would get a large signon bonus" (that is you would be aquired).
Mom - "You're right maybe you could work with your Uncle. He needs computer help from time to time."
Me- "Good idea. I'll have one of my engineers call him and see if we can help."
Mom - "Good. Maybe they can get work also."
Me - "You're the best."