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Comment by theseanstewart | Hacker News Reader

As a parent, I've never understood this sentiment. Gaming is just another "activity" and to say it's "mind numbing" and not productive is disingenuous. Sure, it can be depending on the game, but so can acting and painting and any other activities that kids do.

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Are you a gamer? I play PUBG, I used to play other games. Multiplayer online Games with a competitive aspect trigger my buttons. They can be very rewarding. They provide a constant release of dopamine.

I can’t think of any other activity that comes close to gaming in that regard. Most stuff gets boring after a while. Sure, you can dive in a book and come back two days later when it’s finished. But after doing this a couple times, it gets boring rather quickly.

With gaming, especially never ending competitive online games, one can easily sink hundreds or thousands of hours.

So, as a gamer being honest with myself: I will restrict video game time and media consumption of my kids, because they don’t know yet how to deal with these immense dopamine triggers.

Agreed. In another comment, someone points out that LoL/Dota2 require a lot of dedication and metagame analysis to be good.

Which is true, but doesn't change the fact that I look back at all gaming I did as a massive waste of time, wishing I spent even 10% of that time doing anything else. And even in my early 20s, I couldn't get out of that "just one more game" compulsion many nights and it would impact my work performance and social life. Not really something I want for my children.

I'm in my 30s now and have healthy hobbies again like language learning, reading, and drawing.

I have a feeling a lot of these "gaming are no different than reading or playing a sport" are from young HN gamers. I would've argued the same thing when I was a kid. Not til later did I start wanting to live my life to maximize my sense of fulfillment and minimize regret, and I have a hard time believing gaming does that for anyone.

I realize it on and off. I go through periods where I binge games (I've always been a handheld fan, so 3DS and now Switch) and then I won't play for weeks, while I do other hobbies. I definitely notice a vast difference between when I'm playing games and when I'm not. When playing, I just want to do one more, one more, and even see the game in my head when not playing, or think about metastrategy. Thankfully, it hasn't impacted my life, but I definitely don't want any kids I might have dealing with that until they're able...Though I'll definitely introduce them to games, just keep it limited.

Yes, I am a gamer, and my wife plays occasionally too. We set limits on our kids gaming and use it as a tool for rewarding good behavior. We created a “real life battlepass” for our older kid where he gets 4 weekly challenges (chores, non-gaming learning objectives, etc.) that have to be completed by certain times in order to earn gaming time. We let him come up with one additional challenge that is non-gaming related and then another gaming related challenge (e.g. 5 eliminations in a game of Fortnite). This is all in addition to the normal expectations of keeping your room clean, school work, etc.

Managing their exposure to this type of media is important. They’re going to be exposed to it, and they enjoy it, so instead of fighting it we found a middle ground where we all win.

That's not true at all. I'm a gamer and I LOVE reading books and I removed "pleasure books" (non self improvement books) because they actively disrupt my life much harder than games.

My favorite book series is 14 beefy books (800 pages some of them), I started reading them when 9 were out.

I read the first 9 in 1-2 months, doing ONLY THAT because I loved it so much. Same goes for the previous book series I read (I was 12 at the time, so my memories are not as solid).

I can play games for long hours, but I never end up in that same state where I don't do anything else for an entire month. Sure, there have been a few days where I played all day, but never months.

And I stopped playing games without looking back when I stopped liking them, or when I figured out they were bad for me (mmorpgs especially)

Sort of... gaming is fairly structured play. Unstructured play for younger children, especially creative play with others, is developmentally advantageous.

Gaming isn't "Bad" -- I'm a game developer as well as a parent -- but it's probably a bit over simplified to suggest that it's just another activity. It's not better or worse than painting, for example, but it's important to recognize that it is characteristically different and as a parent it's your responsibility to be intentional about how those differences impact your family.

The anti-screen sentiment today is like the anti-dungeons and dragons hysteria of the 80s. Back then, D&D would turn your kids into occultists. Today, “screens” will turn your kids into mindless zombies. Some things don’t change.

Are you a parent? It's quite easy to identify screen zombies at any social gathering, be it birthday parties, class school events, etc.

Yea I have a six year old. Maybe I lucked out but she and her friends all seem to have a nice mix of interests, both offline and online.

This generation of parents were pretty much all gamers, D&Ders, and so on. It's not for a lack of understanding. I even play many of the same games as my son and even try to get involved in the ones that don't really appeal to me.

But there is something off about kids right now is affecting them in disturbing ways (to a parent). The change is also been really rapid; it was different even 10 years ago.

It seems to me like a large number of parents seem to be struggling with it.

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