* a headphone jack
* removable battery
* 4 years of updates
* no installed software except Play Store
* no modifications to stock AOSP.
As you mentioned, I would install maps, mail and be done with it.
Moto doesn't modify AOSP very much and the one app it has provides some nice features (shake for flashlight being my favorite).
The v1 droid, with the sliding keyboard. I would buy again in an instant if a comparable phone existed. It was _tiny_ too, and indestructible. Loved that phone.
Software updates not what you requested, but from a featureset perspective, other than "turning up the dials" I feel like i'm paying more for less with every upgrade, although that may be blamed in part by app/web bloat.
(This post is an expression of a broad similar gripe I have across much of tech, e.g. within chat software; we peaked with desktop gchat/pidgin >decade ago, the hell have we been doing since then. Discord is a great evolutionary branch but it doesn't fill the original niche)
Edit: As a sister post says, the E4 isn't a terrible alternative, but I find it to be bigger, more finniky, and less functional than the OG droid (currently using an E4). Good price point though.
Edit: oops, battery isn't removable either. Can't remember the last time I saw a phone with that:(