TSA Opt-Out Day, Now with a Superfantastic New Twist

This is even better than Charlie Stross's idea of making sexual noises during the search. I think if you combine the two we could have the TSA staff revolting against their own policy in a week. I can see it now:

<tsa>: Would you like the backscatter or a pat down?

<iuguy>: The pat down brother, I really want the pat down.

<tsa>: Are you sure? It's a physical check for 'resistance'.

<iuguy>: You'll get no 'resistance' from me brother.

<tsa>: Ok [starts patting down and moves thigh up leg]

<tsa>: [moves it above the kilt and has sudden realisation that iuguy is not wearing underwear]

<iuguy>: Hmmmm.... yes.... a little to the left... a little to the right... hhmmmmmmmmm... yeah thats right baby....

<tsa>: Sir are you deriving sexual pleasure from this?

<iuguy>: Have you heard of Ohm's law?

<tsa>: Nope, what's that?

<iuguy>: Well honey, lets just say the combination of your high voltage and my strong current and just let me tell you my resistance is at an all time low.

I guarantee no TSA employee doing the search will be out of therapy within 5 years once I'm done with them.

It's time to bring back the codpiece.