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Comment by brightball | Hacker News Reader

I’ve never been a heavy drinker, but at one point 2 years ago I handled a project by myself to move 6 million dollars a month in charity transactions from one uncooperative payment processor to another.

I normally handled stress well, but this was a different level and it was physically taxing on me. I had a glass of wine one night about 3 weeks into this and immediately felt so much better that I ended up having 3-4 / night for 3 months just to cope with the stress.

As soon as the project ended (successfully I might add), I stopped...but I’ll never forget how much I felt like I needed the alcohol during that time. I’ve never experienced that in my life but it gave me a new appreciation for what it must be like to really struggle with the addiction. If I felt like that every day I don’t know what I’d do.

Sincerest condolences to his family.

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There are certain substances I've found to be helpful for managing intense stress in-lieu of alcohol. If interested, I'd suggest experimenting with each and seeing if any work (or work in combination) for you, as they're all significantly less harmful than alcohol.

1. Agmatine

bonus, reduces alcohol cravings:

https://www.researchgate.net/publication/288735721_Effect_of...

2. L-theanine

3. Taurine

4. Rhodiola rosacea

5. Tulsi

L theanine is amazing.

Disclaimer: pure anecdote !

I wish there was a way to reduce stress the way you describe alcohol does, but without the tolerance-related escalation and the addiction. I have been trying meditation and progressive relaxation - they do work, but only for a limited duration. 2 hours later, you're back to being jittery and edge-of-the-seat.

If the reason is stress, scaling back is probably the wisest option, but if that is not possible for one reason or another, and mental problems enter the mix, people should never be afraid to seek out professional medical help.

I also used alcohol to self-medicate for anxiety. And while in many countries there is a strong stigma against "just taking a pill" to help with this sort of thing, it's a hell of a lot better than becoming an alcoholic.

There is. It's called physical exercise.

Arguably this does/can lead to tolerance escalation and addiction - but most people are fine with that.

People have a wide range of different responses to both exercise and alcohol (along with everything else). For me, exercise does feel like it helps but it also takes physical and mental resources. Also, I tend to exercise more when I have more time available, ie. when I'm less busy and under less pressure, so there's a pretty strong confounding factor involved.

Used for relaxation, alcohol is a quick-fix solution but sometimes that's what you need. A crutch is great for a few days when you've got a sprained ankle and still need to march. Just don't make it a permanent part of your life.

I hope this isn't revisioning. The drinking might actually increase the stress levels, subtly so and slowly, if sticking to small ammounts. That means I'm not denying that the job wasn't difficult to beginn with, but the addicted are prone to shift blame out of proportion--I know because I frequently blame e.g. work schedule, when I'm too tired because I spent all night with something else instead of sleeping like most people regularly manage to achieve. It's literally irresponsible, i.e. not responding to good faith.

It’s accurate. I was worried constantly that I was going to screw something up badly for multiple charities.

I rarely drink at all, but when this was happening my entire chest was tense for the whole time period. When I had the glass of wine just released it for some reason. Alcohol has never really done anything for me so the reaction was a big surprise.

I do appreciate the concern though. I rarely have anything anymore. I usually find that wine gives me headaches now so I never bother. Can’t gave gluten so that cuts out most beer. If anything I’ll have an Old Fashioned if we are out at a nice dinner, but that’s pretty much the extend of what I have these days.

Alcohol should never be used for stress, only for social lubrication.

There's better ways to deal with stress. Pump iron, or go for a run. 30-60 minutes of running should give you a reset.

I’m not proud of it. I was as shocked by the effect at that time.

"social lubrication" is another way of saying reducing anxiety stress.

Social anxiety about the current moment, though. They are different anxieties.

It's irrelevant if one's alcohol requirement for social interaction still results in frequent consumption and potential addiction.

It goes hand in hand. Mental performance is to a large degree reliant on physical performance, as for digestion, respiration, blood circulation, hormone ballance, wakefullness (focus), muscle tonus (literally being upright), nervous integrity and what have you.

Maybe a small bit of spirit is helpfull for digestion. For everything else, alcohol is a nervous agent. Social easing is a bit like shaking up the weights of a neural network, a little randomization does often make no difference and might even help to get out of a local minimum, but also away from an optimum. You don't want to go at it with a cheese grater and kitchen mixer, or let an epileptic operate with a rusty knife on an open heart.

I used alcohol as a social lubricant in college but it was a hit or miss as you said due to do randomization of those weights.

What worked for me years later was to actually work out and lose weight and people start looking at you differently.

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