Thirty years ago you could raise a family with just one parent working. Nowadays that's pretty much impossible. The cost of living has skyrocketed and this leads a lot of people to seek support from their families.
Cutting your household income in half voluntarily is a hard choice to make. It's easier if you've never had the option.
You essentially have to be in the top 1% in some areas to even afford a house and be able to raise a family by yourself. And yes, I guess we could all move away from our family and friends, but not everyone can even afford it or wants to do that for various reasons.
For people in tech, that is all attainable. The trouble is that people listen to what the culture tells them to do, rather than assessing their options and doing what makes sense.
If you take your advice from people who benefit from you being in debt and barely making ends meet, then that is where you will end up.
Considering that only 60% of families have both parents working, I would say that it is still very possible.
https://www.bls.gov/opub/ted/2017/mobile/employment-in-famil...
* As a percentage, what share of single-parent homes receive some kind of government assistance?
* You deliberately neglect that most single-parent homes receive ongoing child support from other parent.
... in the US.
What we need to do to address "inequality" is to tax this transfer of wealth as income so responsible self-sufficient people who didn't get this privilege won't have to unduly subsidize these same people when they hit retirement age and get themselves in the same underwater situation.