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The trick, at least for the hose based system, is to put your finger in front of the stream to increase pressure.

Sounds like a gigantic mess.

I found it to work pretty well, the the only use for toilet paper being to dry off quickly. The jet spray power can often be varied. For health reasons, it is usually set to quite soft though (Washlet Syndrome).

I’ve got a BioBidet (that’s the brand name) and never once has it not fully gotten everything off. There’s a lot of varieties of bidets, you were just using a less automated style most likely.

> getting most of it with your fingers

Please tell me you don't mean this like it appears you do...