I would add 'unforgiving use of linters' to that, where 'unforgiving' generally means that straying even a hair's breadth from the default settings is forbidden.

Especially so when you can't adjust those defaults, thus making your post-listed code substantially more abstract and less readable than it would have been at first.

Case in point: forcing your simple 11-line function to become something more complicated that has to maintain state through each call.

I'll second that. Code reviews -quite often- is a senseless sh_tshow of arrogance, pedantry and psychological issues that have nothing to do with the code.