Groom of the Stool

Interesting there's no apparent etymological connection between "stool" (meaning "turd") and "Groom of the Stool" - Wikipedia has the meaning being the "close stool": the chair near the king's, er, other throne, where presumably the Groom sat to lend assistance or offer some words of encouragement.

This would also be an appropriate title for those employed in polishing turds, a significant fraction of the economy.

> The office developed gradually over decades and centuries into one of administration of the royal finances, and under Henry VII, the Groom of the Stool became a powerful official involved in setting national fiscal policy, under the "chamber system".

and later:

> ... It is a matter of some debate as to whether the duties involved cleaning the king's anus, but the groom is known to have been responsible for supplying a bowl, water and towels and also for monitoring the king's diet and bowel movements[6] ...

Freud had some fascinating ideas on the connection between money and defecation:

> ... In reality, wherever archaic modes of thought have predominated or persist... money is brought into the most intimate relationship with dirt. We know that the gold which the devil gives his paramours turns into excrement after his departure ...

https://www.laphamsquarterly.org/about-money/brown-gold

It appears the English monarchy were tapping into something primal by linking the office of royal defecation helper with finance.

Sounds like a sh*t job.

But interesting to see how the job transformed into managing money. Not sure how you get from A to B...

My Gastroenterologist said the invention of the disposable sigmoidoscope revolutionised his industry. Maybe the groom of the stool dreamed of that...

I like how “The office developed gradually over decades and centuries into one of administration of the royal finances”. Money don’t smell, huh?

OK Silicon Valley, ready to bring the world GOTSaaS?