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flurdy

Two men walk into a bar.

One man orders H2O.

The other says: "I'll have H2O too".

The second man dies.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. "I'll have H2O," says the 1st. "I'll have H2O, too," says the 2nd. Bartender gives them water because he is able to distinguish the boundary tones that dictate the grammatical function of homonyms in coda position, as well as pragmatic context.

https://twitter.com/dianeturnshek/status/939155156645699584?...

Two Nobel laureates walk into a bar. They order Bud Lights because they've got nothing to prove. ;)

As she notes in the thread, the original author appears to be here: https://notallwugs.tumblr.com/post/93075748270/two-scientist...

Always reminds me of the limerick that ends “what he thought was H2O was H2SO4”

Not a limerick, though it has a similar feel. The way I originally heard it was:

    Once there was a chemist
    There isn't any more
    What he thought was H2O
    Was H2SO4.

I've heard a few variants, such as "Bobby was a chemist" or "There isn't one no more". At least one blog[1] claims the original poem from 1894 is:

    Our Willie passed away today,
    His face we’ll see no more;
    What Willie thought was H2O
    Proved H2SO4.

[1] https://www.barrypopik.com/index.php/new_york_city/entry/joh...

I've always heard it as:

    Billy was a chemist's son
    But Billy is no more
    For what he thought was H2O
    Was H2SO4.

and I heard it as:

  Little Timmy took a drink    
  But he will drink no more    
  For what he thought was H2O    
  Was H2SO4

I went down a bit of a rabbit hole with this yesterday. It's interesting--there's clearly some parts of the poem that are effective and lasting, while other parts aren't.

"thought was H20 was H2SO4" is identical in all the variants I found after the mid-20th-century. Most, but not all, have "What he thought was H20 was H2SO4". It seems like they "perfected" that part and it hasn't really changed since.

But the rest is very changeable--a few variants mention chemists and most mention a male name of some sort, but most have nothing else in common.

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