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This is not about being friendly at lunch.

Most jobs involve working with others. Due to the nature of 'work', it's not always easy. The ability to work together towards a shared goal even in the presence of pressures that would challenge interpersonal harmony is an important skill.

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Which you aren't going to judge in an interview without abusive and humiliating tactics, which may not even work because at that point as an interviewee I'm not trying to maintain a relationship and have no real reason not to treat you like a jerk.

I’m at a small company where we as senior software engineers often have to deal directly with demanding customers. I have to know how to be tactful and that’s something we filter for.

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