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Haha, well we just had an earthquake a few minutes ago here in Los Angeles. It was up on Reddit /r/losangeles within a few seconds.

Yep, just woke me up. Here's the seismograph from Occidental college: https://apps.oxy.edu/ws/seismoday.aspx

For the life of me, I can't work out the axes on that graph.

Seismographs have time on the X axis and magnitude on the Y. This one wraps the X axis so each line across the paper is 15min.