Dorothy Parker's successor is perhaps Cintra Wilson, who was fired from the New York Times for this review [1] of the Manhattan J.C. Penny store.

"J. C. Penney has always trafficked in knockoffs that aren’t quite up to Canal Street’s illegal standards. It was never “get the look for less” so much as “get something vaguely shaped like the designer thing you want, but cut much more conservatively, made in all-petroleum materials, and with a too-similar wannabe logo that announces your inferiority to evil classmates as surely as if you were cursed to be followed around by a tuba section.”

[1] https://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/13/fashion/13CRITIC.html