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This just makes you see the app quicker, but it's still unusable until it loads.

The animations are a clever way to hide loading delay from the enduser.

Not every app needs that much time. Apple has done the equivalent of setting a 30mph speed limit on all roads.

The animation still plays even when the app is loaded and in the background. In that case it really does load instantly.

Wow. I've wanted both of those things so many times! I'm seriously interested now.

I disable the animations in accessibility. Is there a JB app that goes beyond that?

Yes. Reduced motion in accessibility still leaves you with a slow cross fade. With a jailbreak you can disable the animations entirely and apps will open instantly.