I reason the difference is mostly when metaprogramming can happen. In Java, redefining or adding code is very explicit, it can't just happen whenever. Same with C#. And there are lots of rules. A class can't modify itself, and there's limits to what changes you can make. And to make changes you must have control over the "classloader" that loaded that code.
JS on the other hand can do most of what ruby does, to my knowledge. Objects are key value pairs so you're free to mess with them in virtually any way you please. You can also mess with the inheritance by altering JS prototype chains.
I don't think metaprogramming itself has much to do with the speed of Ruby, with my admittedly limited knowledge of this stuff