I feel like you're purposefully making this hypothetical difficult and throwing up as many roadblocks as possible.

The obvious answer is that either you own a DVD player or you can get one for next to nothing. Amazon has region free ones for $25.

Black box above the betamax and below the 8-track player - you may need to move all the floppy disk boxes on the floor first. ;)

An external USB DVD player is about $15.

Eighth generation consoles (except the Switch) have a drive that can play DVDs and Blu-Rays.