Maybe take every number in this article and divide it by 2.7 Cost of living in San Francisco is roughly 270% of the national average.
You don’t get to compare on housing, because you live in a city.
So meanwhile city dwellers have more disposable income, who continue to dispose of more income on rent, while their counterparts outside the city get to invest their money in their own property, which they can later sell for a fat return, while continuing to begrudge city dwellers for making a few more bucks in disposable income in the short term?
Living in a city has its upsides and downsides. One of the upsides is higher pay. One of the downsides is pissing away lots of that higher pay paying someone else’s mortgage instead of your own.
However, one thing is certain. Once you have children you'll need bigger housing. A lot of hyper competitive cities aren't very welcoming to families.
Perhaps you value other things like having access to cultural activities, etc, but if you want the same material standard of living, it's much more expensive in these cities.