I vehemently disagree. There is no such thing as minimal fuss in emacs, especially when it comes down essential IDE features.
> for specific languages like Clojure or Common Lisp
Common Lisp is esoteric language at this point, not relevant here, IMO.
That said, the tiling WM features it has are pretty good.
"LSP tooling" for Java/Kotlin/Scala doesn't exist as far as I'm aware. I'm sceptical about LSP stuff anyway. In an IDE performance and latency really matters. IntelliJ plugins have direct heap access to the AST and editors so they can rapidly explore the code, add annotations etc. Java adds some overhead but it gets lower every year, they just never stop optimising the JVM, and serialisation/context switching is gonna add a lot back. Especially as you'll really want to be writing language servers in high level languages anyway. There's no justification for writing such a thing in C++ or Rust.
There's https://github.com/eclipse/eclipse.jdt.ls. It's used by Visual Studio Code's Language Support for Java (https://marketplace.visualstudio.com/items?itemName=redhat.j...).
There are also Kotlin and Scala LSP servers that work. The servers themselves can be a bit annoying to get working, but the emacs integration “Just Works”.