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Comment by rapsey | Hacker News Reader

It may not be politically correct. But the vast majority of women prefer prioritizing their children over their careers. The vast majority of men prefer being the provider for their families.

> Unfortunately, it's hard to force men to take their leave

How about we don't force people into things.

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Men should be given the opportunity to bond very early on with their kids too. Being there as a father.

An infant needs his mother fully. A father has plenty of time to bond. This kind of social engineering is entirely unnecessary.

Notice that my suggestion doesn't force people to do things.

That is just forcing by other means.

It is no more forcing than the child tax credit.

It's called "nudging" for a reason.

if you're free to choose, you might be pressured to exercise the freedom not take the leave under threat of e.g. being made redundant. sometimes not being able to choose is all-in-all better for everyone, and that's disregarding the cost of making a decision.

> How about we don't force people into things.

That's all great in theory, but in practice you are always forced one way or another. If you are not forced to take paternal leave, then social pressure forces you to not take it.

It's possible women prefer that because society has systemically reinforced it by normalising that gender role as an ideal for girls to grow into, while boys are steered toward a different direction

I say this as a father who prioritised my kids over my career, with a wife who prioritised her career over our kids. I know quite a few stay-at-home-mums who would much rather the adult interaction you get from a day at the office. It's just my experience, but it leads me to think there's nothing "innate" about men or women wanting to rear children

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