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Comment by Meph504 | Hacker News Reader

To be honest, it only makes sense it would decline, the advantages of getting married are fewer and fewer, and the recourse of divorce is still severe.

When marrying someone of similar income, there are tax penalties not perks.

Divorce no matter how amicable have to go through the courts, and has a significant cost.

Any many states, marriage means you legally take on the debt of who you are marrying, and that legal obligation is not dissolved in the divorce.

And with the legal partners being recognized, access to things are available without marriage.

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Yeah, my stupid, diphenhydramine-popping stepfather walked away from my disable mother after her stroke and a forest fire while she was away without anything but an email. He took almost everything and just left, and is now trying to cheat her out of spousal support and the many tens of thousands she paid to fix their retirement home. She is currently being kicked-out (move) during the pandemic is and forced now to leave the state.

I'm really sorry to hear that this is happening to your family, and hope you have a good attorney.

Nope. The judge is an ultra-conservative Bible-thumper family court guy (there are only 2 judges in the rural county, and they seem interchangeable) who doesn't care about anyone and her attorney is a lazy, milquetoast, limp lasagna noodle who should be reported to the bar for malpractice. My mom is almost out of money and her ex is dragging her all the way to court and blocking every reasonable settlement. She won't have anything left after this is over. The ex even muttered "why did he do it" under his breath because it's costing him so much, like he has some sort of dementia mixed with regret going on. The kicker is he will eventually inherit millions of dollars, but my mom will die in abject poverty while he quibbles about $100 of spousal support which is peanuts to him.

Again sorry to hear that, it might be worth attempting to look up disabled advocate services, they often can provide legal council, or guidance. If your mother is disabled you might want to look into "Criminal Abandonment."

I know these situations can seem hopeless, and frankly some are, but in many cases the legal proceedings play out simply because the other side doesn't know or do anything to contest them.

And searching out an advocate and having a phone call with them is a really low bar considering the ability for them to possibly change the trajectory of the situation.

Best of luck with this.

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