That's why I don't let black people into my restaurant. Statistically, they're more likely to commit a crime once inside, so I don't want to take the risk. All the black people in town end up going to the restaurant down the street, who had their register robbed one time by a dark-skinned fellow that I turned away because he sure looked suspicious! I sure hope they've learned their lesson by now.

You can bet that as a black person in our town, you'll pay substantially more than white folks, because most of us understand that black people have a reputation for this sort of stuff and general trouble, and we don't want to take the risk.

I really wish there was some kind of certificate to let us know which ones are the docile blacks...

(Note: It should go without saying that this is a tongue-in-cheek response)