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Comment by diegocg | Hacker News Reader

>A 2016 review that looked at research on children sharing not just a room but a bed with one or more of their parents found a high prevalence in many Asian countries:

Let me guess: there is a high correlation between sharing your room and poverty levels?

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I don't understand needing a room for yourself before puberty strikes. Even then, sharing the room with a same-gender sibling doesn't sound too bad. It's funny because these same people go to college and share their dorm room for the 1st 2 years of university, when someone needs the most amount of privacy.

> correlation between sharing your room and poverty levels

In India, unless you are super rich, having a room to yourself is pretty rare. This becomes especially true because the richest people want to stay in the biggest cities, where the ratio of housing/income outpaces places like SF and NYC.

The priority for bedrooms usually goes as follows:

    Parents -> Grand parents -> Guests -> Kids/Servants

Only-childs in a wealthy-ish nuclear family are the only ones who get a room all to 1 person.

> The priority for bedrooms usually goes as follows:

    Parents -> Grand parents -> Guests -> Kids/Servants

I've only ever seen this order once, but I would agree that this is pretty much how most Indian households are setup. My SO's grandparents lived with their daughter & her family (6 in total) in a tiny one bedroom situation, and while I wasn't privy with their sleeping arrangements, I think the grandparents slept on the floor in the hall. It wouldn't surprise me if the female members of the household slept in one room while the men slept in the other. Their house was too small for multiple beds, so they usually rolled out mats when it was time to sleep. I think the elderly grandfather had a cot.

Growing up the youngest of three siblings in a 3 bedroom home, I usually slept on the sofa in the living room. I was supposed to share a room with my teenage brother, but he wouldn't tolerate me to be in the same room.

Genuine question: the bedroom is traditionally (where I come from, Western Europe) also a common place for couples to have sex. In addition, many people presumably would prefer not to walk in on their parents, or have sex in front of their children. So how does this work in cultures where it's common for children not to have their own rooms until puberty starts (so 10 to 13 years?)? Do people get more adventurous about when and where they do it, or is there less of a taboo on getting it on in front of the kids, or, since you mention India, are those delicious spices used to mask the taste of the sleeping pills everybody is feeding their children?

I wonder about this myself. I have no clue when my parents had sex and our house was one of the bigger ones (2 bedroom vs 1 bed room). I was ALWAYS in the bedroom, so no way I could've missed it when awake.

Indians frequently send their kids over to an aunt/uncle's place once every month or so....so maybe then ? Another common solution is to move your kid to the living room for sleeping.

I slept with my parents until my brother was born, and never spent a night away from them before this. So...I guess they did it while I was in the room. X|

> delicious spices used to mask the taste of the sleeping pills everybody is feeding their children

The most plausible theory I have heard so far. Indian food IS sleep-inducing and I sleep like a rock, so I won't be one to disagree there.

The simple truth is that dealing with young babies is way easier when they're in the same bed. When they cry, you can comfort them immediately, if you need to breastfeed, it takes about 5 seconds to get started. And they sell these nifty little divider things if you're paranoid about rolling over and crushing them, although as the article says this only appears to be a problem in practice if the parents are morbidly obese and/or on drugs/alcohol.

> this only appears to be a problem in practice if the parents are morbidly obese and/or on drugs/alcohol.

Or if you have a baby who fusses but doesn't actually need anything.

>there is a high correlation between sharing your room and poverty levels?

might be one variable. Another could be "average size of a typical home in sqm" and "population density of city where family resides"

I think you'd find some evidence for historical poverty being one factor of several in cultural practices of bed sharing. Japan would be a notable exception (plenty of co-sleeping, unremarkable poverty rate).

I also don't think it has become much less common in communities where poverty levels have fallen. Anecdotally, my SO is part of a community originally displaced from India and now settled all over the world, where members have disproportionately become very wealthy. Bed sharing is absolutely the norm in those households, much to my distress when we visit her family!

Not sure what you mean by Japan being an exception? Bed-sharing remains very much the default there.

I was trying to say that this is common in Japan, where poverty is almost certainly not the major factor. A counter to the parent comment's assertion. Should have been clearer.

30 percent of British children are living in poverty. https://cpag.org.uk/child-poverty/child-poverty-facts-and-fi...

I don't think poverty in britain or india mean the same thing.

Of course, poverty in Britain is something the Tories actually do want, whereas in India I'm sure every major party is fighting against poverty.

please leave your personal partisan politics at the door.

And some of those children, especially the poorest, will share beds with a parent.

See eg this from Buttle: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-45017513

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