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Comment by deanmoriarty | Hacker News Reader

I am victim of this myself. By all metrics, I am successful (great software engineer career, overcame obstacles to immigrate to US and move to Silicon Valley, at 34 I have a $3M liquid net worth thanks so savings and frugal living, ...).

Yet, a substantial amount of my peers are doing so much better than me. They all won the IPO lottery from multiple companies and are sitting on $20M+ in their mid-late 20s. Others have incredible executive careers at FAANG, with compensations of $3M+ a year.

I understand survivorship bias, lottery luck, ... but when 80% of your network is in that position and you clearly feel left behind, it’s hard to say that it was luck, luck shouldn’t be that common by definition.

For me, the solution will likely be to move out of this area and relocate to a more middle class place. When I meet all my friends for dinner and they all drive Teslas while I am on my Honda, it doesn’t feel right.

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Dude your post is so silly I don't know where to start.

Confirms what I'm sure of, that there are plenty of people who have a ton of money and yet don't even know how to live life.

Go run, meditate, camp, eat shrooms, read some classic worldly books like from Hesse. You'll realize how silly you are trying to compare yourself to others when you already have enough to live a great life for the rest of your time here.

I'm pretty sure you could easily buy a Tesla if you wanted to with 3 million in the bank. It's like somebody with a Virginia ham under their arm crying the blues because they don't have any bread.

In all honesty, sounds like you are in dire need of perspective. You should take some inspiration from your username and hit the road.

I agree with everything you said, that’s why I think moving away from Silicon Valley and building a network of “normal” people will be my best cure here.

I fully understand the controversy of my earlier message, I grew up poor in a modest European country after all.

But when you live your daily life and nearly all your friends of similar age or younger live in beautiful houses that cost $3M+ and you cannot even host a house gathering because you live in a rented small condo, that slowly affects your perspective.

I fully understand I could buy a Tesla. The difference is that a Tesla would be 5% of my net worth, so a very significant expense that I’m not going to entertain for a luxury and useless purchase.

For most of my peers, it’s 0.5%, so insignificant and more akin to what I would spend for a very nice vacation. Same analogy for an expensive house.

A Tesla would be less than 3% of your net worth (a fully optioned out model 3, no less). Just go buy it if you're really that bothered by not having one.

You don't have to host parties at your place, just go party at your friend's place.

You'll likely cross double digit millions by the time you're in your mid or late 40s - I don't get what you're moping about. Go put $100k into ETH and thank me later if you're looking to take a risk and ride the wave.

Sounds to me like you’re doing quite good! In Europe, $3M would be nothing to scoff at. Driving a Honda sounds like good character to me.

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